Yes, no, maybe so.

YES, I know it’s been nearly a month since the last time I’ve written.

NO, this is not going to be a regular habit…being too busy to be able to find anything to write about.

MAYBE SO, as in MAYBE I’ll get better at writing more often, and MAYBE I won’t. You’ll just have to hang in there and see.

Now, for how busy I’ve been lately, you’d think I’d have something to say about my recent whereabouts and latest escapades. Well, I don’t. Usually I don’t write about anything unless I can make it funny somehow. You know, I’m not that great at seeing the humorous end of things when I’m on the wrong side of a joke…except for when I suddenly get the brilliant idea that my latest blond moment would make a great blog post. And then if I can manage to be the first one to make fun of myself, instead of letting you all have that privilege, it makes it a little easier to bear the embarrassment.

So MAYBE the reason for all my blog silence doesn’t completely fall on my busyness and lack of time to write. MAYBE it’s because I haven’t done anything stupid or “blond-y” lately.

(Hey, now why are you laughing? That’s not an entirely remote idea! Or is it?)

I have to wonder how many times my mind has wandered back to the words on that first post of mine, when I first started this With Eagles’ Wings blog:

I will try not to bore you to death, but I can’t promise that you’ll come away from every post inspired.

How well I predicted my future blog posts! I’ve seriously tried to write some solemn posts. Such as the post titled “Waiting.” That one was going to be one of the more serious posts I’ve ever written. But I ended up deleting it and completely redoing it, and of course it turned out quite different than I first imagined. Someone once said that no one but an author could understand the way that a story “writes itself”, with the writer staring on in amazement as the story unfolds right before their eyes. Now, I can’t boast too loudly about being an author, but I definitely understand what they’re saying. Sometimes that happens to me too. That’s what happened on the post, “Waiting,” which was originally supposed to be very serious. And I’m afraid that’s what just happened here. I hadn’t planned on writing all this.

Anyways, I would get back to the subject, except that there isn’t any. I didn’t even start out with a goal in mind this time, other than to just ramble on. I think I’ve been most successful on that one. But just in case you actually wanted to hear something beneficial, I will share a little bit about what is different in my life now than a year ago.

(Really, though, 2013 seems like it could have only been, like, four days ago. Is it just me?)

So, what’s new for me since January 04, 2013?

  • I have a new baby brother, born in September, named Henry.
  • I have several great new friends.
  • I am now sixteen years old. And please, refrain from saying that that makes you feel old. I’ve had enough people tell me that already. 🙂 Of course, there are those of you out there who would say that my turning sixteen makes you feel young. Well, don’t say that either.
  • I now have my second learner’s permit, since I only got eight and a half hours of driving experience in one year (a far cry from the 50 hours I am supposed to have), much to the amusement of several friends and family members, and to the dismay of several other family members. Sorry…driving isn’t my favorite, although I’m enjoying it a bit more now that I have had [a little] more experience.
  • I am on my second year as an Awana leader helping out with T&T (or TNT, as I like to call the sometimes rowdy 3rd-6th graders), and I have been enjoying it.
  • I am not as crazy about horses this year as I was last, which some would say is a plus. To those of you who didn’t know me a two or three years ago, take it from me that I was crazy about horses to the point of being annoying even to those who liked them and rude to those who didn’t. I would have to say, even I recognize that it is a good thing that I’m not that way anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I still love those animals and I have Breyers (the horse models, not the ice cream) and horse/western decorations all over my room. Let’s just say that I used to make an idol out of them, and now I don’t.
  • I think I can type faster today than I could exactly one year ago. My goal is to be able to type faster than I can backspace. Don’t laugh; try it yourself.
  • There are four more members in the Juzyk/Bergen/McEndarfer/extended Bergen family than there was last year at this time: Henry, my brother; Mike, my cousin; Lashae, my second cousin; and Locke, another second cousin.
  • We have a new trampoline. That’s way more exciting than you’d think.
  • I’ve now learned two more hairdos (besides just having it hang straight down). Ponytail and half-ponytail. I know, I’m talented. I am determined to learn how to do a French braid this year, though. My sister tells me that I have to learn to braid backwards (like with my hands behind my head instead of in front of me), and I haven’t mastered that yet. I mean, it’s kind of hard to master something when I haven’t even tried yet. There are other more important things that call my attention.
  • I gained 150 books worth of knowledge, most of which is fictional knowledge, if you know what I mean. I’m not that big a fan of nonfiction…it has to be pretty good to hold my attention. That’s not to say that I will never read it…I have to. Mom made a rule that for every four fiction books I read, I have to read one nonfiction or a classic, such as Pride & Prejudice. I really do think I’ve been reading and writing too much lately (not on my blog, but on books that I’m writing), because lately in my dreams I hear a narration going on, sort of like a book written in the first person. “They were shocked that I knew their names…after all, we had never met before. Of course, they couldn’t know that I read their blog all the time and paid attention to their names so that I would know exactly who they were. At their shocked faces, Hannah and me laughed…or wait a minute, should that be me and Hannah?…or Hannah and I?… Well, anyways, we laughed.” Please tell me I’m not the only one that narrates my dreams!? 🙂

I really don’t think you even want to know how long it took me to think up those eleven things that are new this year.

Oh, I forgot one thing…I’m in tenth grade this year, doing algebra. That pretty much sums up my school life this year. I’ve only ever met one and a half people that like algebra. The one person is my sister, and the half is me…half the time. Sometimes I like it, and sometimes I very strongly dislike it.

And since I’ve already been going nearly three hours on this one post (yeah, sometimes it takes a while for my brain to kick in and concentrate on the task at hand), I might as well add an extra one or two and tell you some of the things I hope to accomplish in 2014.

(Sorry…I don’t do resolutions. I’m horrible at those. So whatever the things listed below mean to you, they are NOT resolutions to me. I guess I just never have understood the logic in making promises you know you can’t keep. 🙂 )

  • First and foremost, I want to spend much more time in prayer. Time alone with just me and my Creator is sweet and nourishing, but I confess that I have done very poorly with this area in my life the last few years. I’ve been too “busy” with other things, and I often forget my devotions and prayer. Prayer is important and very much needed, not only for those we pray for, but for us, to reconnect with our Lord and Savior. I don’t think anyone can know how truly blessed we are to have direct communication with God.
  • Secondly, I want to learn patience. I know one does not acquire this amazing, unending virtue in just a year, but I want to make some headway on it. Patience is one thing I lack much of, but probably one of the things I need most.
  • I want to learn to guard my thoughts. That is something that I have found hard to do, but “I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:13)
  • Now, this may seem strange, but I want to learn how to type 50 words per minute using one hand. Not sure whether it will be my left or my right that I’ll try first, but I’m eager to see how it works.
  • I want to learn how to draw cartoon faces holding the pencil in my toes. I’ve also thought about sticking the eraser end of the pencil in my nose and drawing that way, but that’s not a very good thing to practice in front of siblings.
  • I want to learn how to play at least a simple version of Joy to the World standing backwards at the piano. It’s harder than it sounds, especially if you are easily vulnerable to cramps in your arms and neck.
  • I want to memorize the whole book of Matthew. I’d also like to start on Proverbs, but I might have to wait till after I’m done with Matthew; otherwise I might start quoting Proverbs right in the middle of the beatitudes.
  • I want to list in a notebook or on the computer all the similarities between Robin Hood and David. I just bought a book on our Kindle about Robin Hood (the most original one I could find) so I can start studying, and I’m reading in 1st Samuel right now, learning about David. Have you ever noticed how much alike David and Robin Hood are? They are both running from an evil king; both live out in the wilderness; both have poor men, thieves, and vagabonds as followers; both have a band of men that are special to them (Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men; David and his band of Mighty Men); both protect the poor and help them; both have had their chance to kill or harm the one who is hunting them down, and neither of them take it…instead, they play “tricks”, of sorts, on those who were chasing them. Someone pointed out to me that at the time Robin Hood was written, there weren’t many other books besides the Bible…and maybe Robin Hood was based, in a way, off of the stories of David in the Bible. Anyways, whether or not it is, I want to list out all the ways the two stories are the same, and kill two birds with one stone. I get my curiosity satisfied, and I have a new, interesting way to study 1st and 2nd Samuel. Call me strange, but I think this will be a lot of fun!

Some of those things that I hope to accomplish might sound silly and worthless. And some of them might be…like drawing with a pencil in my nose or playing a song on the piano standing backwards. But they’re challenges, and I enjoy challenges. The BIGGEST challenge, though, isn’t going to be typing 50 words per minute with one hand or writing with my toes.

If you’ve read Galatians 5:22-23, you know what the “fruit of the Spirit” is. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering [or patience], kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control. Against such there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23, NKJV)

I need help with all of those. Everyone can use more practice (no matter how much they’ve already had) on each of these “fruits”. Once I decided that each week I would take one of these fruits and practice them each day for seven days. Then, after I was done the first — love — I would go on to the next — joy — and so on and so forth. Soon I realized that it takes much more than a week to master these fruits. I’m not sure if they can ever be mastered fully in YEARS the way Jesus illustrated them — he had perfect love, perfect peace, perfect kindness and goodness…he showed us what it really means to possess each of these fruits, and to use them for God’s glory — but he gives us strength to do his will.

Sometimes it feels like I am getting nowhere on patience…but I know that I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength.

And even though drawing with a pencil in my nose is nowhere near the difficult task that learning patience is, I am still going to try it.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

Maybe I’ll even share a few pictures…if they turn out to be anywhere near discernible…