There is nothing like having a restless night of sleep [or, in my case, a restless night of no sleep whatsoever], having a shower at 7 o’clock in the morning because you can’t think of anything else to do, and then going back to bed and sleeping till three o’clock in the afternoon.

And here I am suddenly thinking about what to have for lunch when it’s about time for my little brother to wake up from his afternoon nap.

No, seriously, I know what you’re thinking. I am NOT lazy. I mean, don’t ask my brothers and sisters to verify that statement because I know what they’d say, but at least I have an excuse, and that’s saying something.

I thought about waiting till 5 o’clock to eat lunch, but my real excuse is that I can’t find what all of the normal early-risers had to eat. Anyways, since I have a headache from not sleeping enough and then way over-sleeping, and a stomachache from not having eaten lunch yet, I thought it would help to come stare at the computer screen for an hour or two. Not.

Actually, staring at the glaring white computer screen could hardly help my headache at all, especially since the light coming out of the screen is enough to give someone a sunburn!

But that’s beside the point.

The real reason I’m down here is because I am trying to think of all the nice things I can say about my younger just-turned-fourteen-years-old brother.

Dear Brady,

I know you never read my blog, but in case you someday come back to my blog as a one hundred year old man and find this post by your sweet sister who loved you so dearly, here is my Happy Birthday letter to you.

The reason I bought you Nerds for your birthday is because you are one. (Wait a minute…if I remember right, I bought a package of Nerds for myself, as well….)

But you are the funnest Nerd I have ever been around in my whole entire life. Isn’t it fun to play catch with an imaginary ball during family devotions?

Remember when we slept out on the trampoline on that frigid night, back in good old 2012? We were shivering so hard that we couldn’t see straight enough to find the Big Dipper. Not that we could have found the Big Dipper anyway.

Remember crawling underneath our uncle’s canoe in the middle of a hide-and-seek game, shutting our eyes to the snakes and spiders that shared our hiding spot with us, and nearly sweating to death while we waited for the “Seeker” to come and find us? Remember pulling nearly half of a horse’s mane out by the roots while we tried to figure out the art of swinging up on a horse?

Remember getting sick on the merry-go-round?

Remember dressing up as a princess? Oh, you assured us that the red dress with little white flowers was a king’s robe, but I knew better.

Speaking of dressing up, remember that pink coat and hat?

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Yes, that’s you Brady. And I think you do remember. Forgive me for my cruelty, but I’m not finished yet. Ah, but my mention of the little pink dress and the “king’s robe” reminds me of something…remember the brown, curly wig?

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Of course you do.

P.S. Just so everyone knows, Brady doesn’t have his ears pierced. They are magnetic balls that clamp on to anything and everything, including Brady’s ears.

Remember the times we would make faces and see who could make the other laugh the hardest? You usually won.

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Remember those bubble gum chewing contests?

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How many pieces did you get in your mouth? 10? 11? Some crazy number. I only made it to nine, and believe me, my jaw was sore. I still can’t look at the stuff without feeling sick.

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Whose crazy idea was it to use the gum for a jump rope…?

And of course, I have to include this picture. Since I’m already in big trouble for most of the pictures I’ve already posted, I might as well add a few more.

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Even though you’re strange, you’re still my most favorite fourteen-year-old brother ever. Who would believe you’re a teenager already? But you can do some cool stuff.

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I’m blessed to have you for a brother. You’ve taught me many things, namely how to run when you get mad at me. And you’ve taught me other things too, but that was the most important one. I probably wouldn’t still be alive if you hadn’t taught this virtue to me. [Is running a virtue?]

Life would be empty and boring in the Bergen household if you hadn’t come along. I love it how you’re so sympathetic to me when I get in trouble. Especially when you were my partner in crime, and were more to blame than I was.

So if you visit my blog as a one hundred year old man, I’m sure your eyes will water and your nose will run when you see my beautiful Happy Birthday letter to you.

Especially if it is haying season. I hate allergies.

So Happy Birthday, Brady, even if, by the time you see this, it will be one hundred years too late. I hope I’ll be dead by then.

Your loving sister,

Kaitlyn M. Bergen

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